Parties for adolescents and young people: more than biosecurity

As a parent, you recognize the importance of your adolescent’s social life and know that parties are a way to socialize and relax. But an unsupervised or poorly planned party can have undesirable or even tragic consequences.

The parental responsibility It is the key to enjoying a fun and safe party. 18 years may be the age of majority in many countries, but the human brain does not finish developing until around 25. Much of this restructuring occurs in the frontal cortex, where decision-making, problem-solving, and control are housed. impulse and emotional regulation, as explained to Business Insider therapist Katie Lear, specializing in anxiety and trauma in children and adolescents.

During this time, Young people make decisions with the amygdala, the part of the brain that handles the basic fight-or-flight reaction. This explains why adolescents find it difficult to think about long-term consequences or the impact of their actions on third parties. It doesn’t help that the first news about the coronavirus suggested that young people were not at risk having severe symptoms. It was not known then that one could be asymptomatic and spread the virus or develop discomforts long afterwards.

There is also a phase where young adults feel invinciblesays clinical psychologist Forrest Talley. Most of them are sure that luck and reason are on their side, and that they are immune to the laws of physics and common sense, and tend to ignore information that denies that belief. Max Planck Institute study (Scientific Reports, 2017). So when told not to form large groups, many will dismiss the information.

Then there is that socializing is really important to young people. They are developing their identity, and this generally happens in the context of social relationships. Feeling part of a group is essential to your self-esteem.

This need for social approval is accompanied by a stage in which the young person becomes self-centered. Telling him to wear a mask to protect others goes against his emotional process, which is focused on himself, his thoughts and feelings. To this is added the effect of social networkssays educational psychologist Christie Kederian, as they convince kids that ‘everyone’ is watching out for them.

Talley explains that if someone like this is ordered to ‘stay home’, he feels like he’s being treated like a child again, with strict rules of when to go out and who to associate with.

By lastGoing public is one of the ways that young people retain a sense of normalcy, to divert attention from the frustration associated with the pandemic.

It is not that they are unaware of the risks, but that they choose to distract themselves from all that, especially when they do not have safe relationships with their parents and they rely on friends for emotional support, says Leela Magavi, a child and youth psychiatrist.

Now that you know why your teen or young adult is unable or unwilling to be more careful, the purpose is not to prohibit meetings, but to mediate to ensure that they are safe. The American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP) offers the following important information about teen parties.

• Know the guest list. Due to social media, youth parties can become too big for parents to control.
• Parents should know the time and place. It happens that the parties usually start late at night and go from one house to another.
• Young people often hope to find alcohol in the parties. Some parents believe that the solution is to let them drink at home, where they are protected. The AAP explains that this idea is absurd, since You cannot protect an adolescent whose judgment is impaired.
• Alcohol affects teens differently than adults. With alcohol, teens are more likely to have sex, be involved in violent incidents, or be injured. Compared to adults, they are more prone to staying up late, driving or wandering, while at the same time suffering from greater mental impairment.
• Take the trouble to form a parent network. Get to know your children’s friends and parents. If your teen is planning to go to a party, call the parents to confirm that they will be home and that they will not allow the use of alcohol. If this is not possible, do not give your child permission.

If you are the one having the party at your house, plan. Do the program with your child. Encourage him to plan activities or games that involve alcohol.

Limit the number of attendees: 10-15 teens for each adult. Make sure at least one adult is present at all times. If necessary, ask other parents to come help you.

Make a guest list. The party should only be for guests. Do not allow entry to people who are not on the list. This will prevent the party from being “open house”.

Set the time the party starts and ends. Find out if there are local curfew laws to determine the end time of the party.

Set the party rules and your expectations. Discuss them with your child.

• There will be no tobacco, alcohol or other drugs.
• No one will be able to leave the party and then come back.
• The lights will be on all the time.
• Some rooms in the house will be closed.

Have enough food and non-alcoholic beverages. What’s more, Lock up your alcoholic beverages and your prescription and over-the-counter medicines.

Be present but not intervening. Pick a place where you can see what’s going on. It could also help serve snacks and drinks.

If your teen is going to a party, know the address and how long you will be there. Get the party’s phone number and address. Ask him to call you if the party location changes.

Call the parents hosting the party to confirm that they will be present, supervising. Make sure that the use of tobacco, alcohol and other drugs will not be allowed.

Talk to your teen beforehand about how to deal with a situation where there is alcohol at a party.

Make sure your teen has a way to go to the party and come home. Make it easy for him to leave the party by emphasizing that you can call you at any time for you to pick it up. Discuss in which cases I should make that call. Remind him never to ride in a car driven by someone who has been drinking or using other drugs.

Be awake when your teen gets home. This way you can check the arrival time and talk with your child about the events of the night.

If your teen is going to be staying over at a friend’s house after the party, check this out with the friend’s parents and make sure they will be home. (F)