People think I’m a childless, selfish person. The truth is that some of them shouldn’t be parents either

I am 33 years old and I think I made a conscious decision not to have children. I suspect I won’t change my mind. I always thought I wouldn’t be a good mom. I wouldn’t be able to devote myself fully to this role. After one day with my godson, I usually feel exhausted. In the evenings, when I’m taking care of him, I always think that being a parent is really not for me. Then I am completely drained and overstimulated.

Am I really a bad egoist?

I realize that I am extremely lucky. My two older sisters are already mothers. That’s why my parents never pressured me about having grandchildren. And when I told them that I wasn’t planning motherhood, they accepted it calmly. They didn’t criticize me and didn’t put any pressure on me. However, not everyone is so lucky. I know from various people’s accounts that their parents really want to be grandparents. And they feel obliged to make this dream come true. They probably don’t think about whether they are even suitable for this role. However, I know that being a mother is not for me. Unfortunately, sometimes I get the impression that for many people my decision is selfish.

Recently, however, a certain thought occurred to me. Am I really the bad egoist? I started to wonder if I was too strict in assessing my attitude, or maybe others approached the issue of parenthood very recklessly. During a family meeting, I noticed that my cousin’s daughter was “taking care of herself.” Her parents were not interested in her at all. I was also surprised when I saw what five-year-old Antosia was watching on her phone. It was certainly not content aimed at small children and full of vulgarisms and rudeness. Only after my intervention did her parents take her phone away.

They think I’m a childless, selfish person. And they behave in such a way that I don’t know why they have children at all DimaBerlin/shutterstock

I was terrified and outraged

Some time ago I also witnessed a much more shocking situation that ended with the arrival of an ambulance. I was waiting for a treatment with a beautician. There was a lady sitting next to me who was very engaged in a conversation with someone on Messenger. Suddenly we heard loud crying. It turned out that her several-year-old son had fallen down the stairs. I was terrified and outraged at the same time. The boy’s head was broken, the reception ladies quickly called for help. Previously, however, the child’s mother did not seem very interested in him. She only woke up when she heard crying.

These are, of course, some individual stories. I know that there is no shortage of wonderful and committed parents in the world. However, in my opinion, not everyone is suitable for this role. People criticize people like me, accusing us of selfishness. But in my opinion, the truth is that some of them shouldn’t be parents either.