“I’m already over 60 and I’ve had enough of serving my husband, being at my children’s beck and call.” [LIST]

I’m over 60 and I’ve had enough. This serving my husband, being at the children’s beck and call, thinking about everyone but myself. I subordinated my entire life to others. First you had to please your husband, then you had to take a few years out of your life to take care of your children. All this time, I was still fighting with my mother-in-law to keep these relationships the way they were – although my teeth were often grinding so much that I was already making an appointment with the dentist. In the meantime, everyone wanted something from me, and I was stupid and rushed to help. I never thought about whether it suited me, whether it was inconsistent with my plans, whether I had the strength for it. I never said no.

“Mom, can we drop the kids off for the weekend?” – enough of this

I don’t want to come across as a bitch. I’m happy about it and I’m proud that people around me have always known they can rely on me. I’m glad I have good people around me. However, recently I realized that I have never been good to myself. I always put the needs of others first. I could change (and sometimes spoil) my plans just to make someone else’s life better. I’m sick of it. I’m 60 years old, most of my life is behind me and the only thing I did for myself was borrowing books, which I didn’t always have time to read, or taking a trip to the seaside with a friend. Meanwhile, even now I still hear: “Gosia, maybe you can postpone this meeting with your friend and help me with the garden?” or “Mom, can we drop the kids off for the weekend?”

Enough of this. I’ve worked hard all my life to make it easier for others, and now, in retirement, I’m going to make the most of this life. I have already informed the children that I would be happy to take care of my grandchildren, but we need to make some schedule. And it won’t be every other weekend like before. My husband just learned how to use the coffee machine because I was the one serving him coffee all the time. I booked a trip to Zakopane for the weekend. Alone. Without a husband, children, grandchildren, friends or colleagues. I plan to turn off my phone and turn it on in the evenings to let me know I haven’t been kidnapped by a bear on the trail. I don’t know yet how I’ll feel about it, but I’m going to try. And if you have been serving others all your life, I also recommend you finally change something.