She grew up with an alcoholic father. “He came back from work around 5 p.m. Drunk, sometimes more, sometimes less”

Maria Pakulnis recalls traumatic memories from the times when she grew up with an alcoholic father and did not receive support from her mother. – My father usually came back from work around 17. Drunk, sometimes more, sometimes less – she said in an interview with Dorota Wodecka. Fragments of the book were published by Onet. One of the shocking experiences that a child should never experience was particularly memorable for the actress.

I hear him opening the front door, I run to him from under the stove where my mother and I are sitting, and I see that he is drunk. Then I had an attack of hatred that I had never experienced in my life. I grabbed my little stool and swung at it. I wanted to kill him, you know? I screamed. And my mother looked at me with a straight face and said, ‘Calm down, you hysterical.’ And yet I had the feeling that I was running to defend her because I wanted her to be well. When I heard: ‘Hysteric’, I fainted from the inability to experience two extreme feelings

– Maria Pakulnis confessed.

The actress recalls her traumatic childhood. “He forgot how much harm he did to us”

She left her family home to start her studies. She had no intention of going back there, but she was tormented by remorse. “At the end of my studies, my dad was taken to hospital with a hemorrhage. They had half of his stomach removed, but my sister and I didn’t go to see him. We were mad at him for our childhood and his drinking. We wanted to punish him. We hoped that maybe after the surgery he would stand up. a miracle happened, and it actually happened,” we read.

He was born again. He stopped drinking and smoking. And he forgot how much harm he had done to us

– the actress told Dorota Wodecka.

“I remember a moment of terrible tension as to whether he would come back or not.”

Maria Pakulnis also recalled that they never knew whether they would have Christmas Eve in a given year – because they were anxiously waiting to see whether their father would return from work under the influence of alcohol or not. She also added that she was afraid of him, despite the fact that he did not start drunken fights.

If you see your father not drunk, but mostly drunk, with whom you have no contact, who never greets you, never takes you on his lap or hugs you, you are afraid of his return. I remember a moment of terrible tension as to whether he would come back or not

– we read in the actress’ shocking memoirs.

Source: Onet