The pope recalled that during confinement coexistence has been very hard for many marriages and many have experienced their breakdown.
The Pope Francisco He advised listening to each other as a family to face conflicts and difficulties, instead of “isolating ourselves with our cell phones or accusing each other, always repeating the same phrases.”
The pontiff addressed the issue of family problems and assured that “the daily challenge, and is won with the right attitude, with small attentions, with simple gestures, taking care of the details of our relationships.”
“But how to do it?” Asked Francisco. And he replied that “to preserve harmony in the family, we must fight against the dictatorship of the self ”.
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“It is dangerous when, instead of listening to ourselves, we blame ourselves for our mistakes; when, instead of caring for others, we focus on our own needs; when, instead of talking, we isolate ourselves with our mobile phones; when we accuse each other, always repeating the same phrases, staging a play already seen in which each one wants to be right and at the end there is a cold silence “, he asserted.
For this reason, he repeated one of his advice: “At night, after all, make up. Never go to sleep without having made peace, because if not the next day there will be a cold war. “
“How many times, unfortunately, conflicts arise within the walls of the home as a result of too long silences and unhealed selfishness! Sometimes it even goes as far as physical and moral violence. This breaks the harmony and kills the family. Let’s go from “me” to “you,” he advised.
He asked divorced people not to cause pain to children
The pope recalled that during confinement coexistence has been very hard for many marriages and many have experienced their breakdown and asked that “they do not stop seeking help so that conflicts can be overcome in some way and do not cause even more pain” to them. their children.
This is what he said in the letter that Francis wrote on the occasion of the year dedicated to the “Amoris laetitia family”, five years after the publication of the Apostolic Exhortation, and in which the pontiff also expresses “closeness and affection” to the married couples who They have broken”.
“However, for some married couples the coexistence to which they have been forced during the quarantine has been especially difficult. The problems that already existed were aggravated, generating conflicts that have often become almost unbearable. Many have even experienced the breakdown of a marriage that had been enduring a crisis that was not known or could not be overcome, “he explained.
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For the Pope “the breakdown of a conjugal relationship generates a lot of suffering due to the disappointment of so many illusions; Lack of understanding provokes discussions and wounds that are not easy to repair ”and“ it is not possible for children to save themselves the suffering of seeing that their parents are no longer together ”.
But he advised: “Even so, do not stop seeking help so that conflicts can be overcome in some way and do not cause even more pain between you and your children” and that you seek forgiveness “that heals all wounds.”
Although he also explained that the pandemic and confinement has had the positive effect of increasing “the time spent together” and this has been “a unique opportunity to cultivate dialogue as a family.”
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“Of course, this requires a special exercise of patience, it is not easy to be together all day when in the same house you have to work, study, recreate and rest,” he said.
And he added: “That fatigue does not win over you, that the force of love encourages you to look more at the other, at your spouse, at your children, than at your own fatigue.”
To young people who are preparing for marriage, Francisco warned that “if before it was difficult to project a future when it was difficult to find a stable job, now it increases even more with the situation of job uncertainty.”
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For this reason, he invited the couple “not to be discouraged, to have the creative courage that Saint Joseph had” and not to hesitate “to lean on their own families and friends, in the ecclesial community, in the parish, to live the conjugal life. and family learning from those who have already walked the path that you are beginning ”.
Regarding the grandparents and grandmothers “who during the time of isolation were deprived of seeing and being with their grandchildren” and the elderly who lived in these days “even more radically loneliness”, the pope affirmed that “the family cannot do without of the grandparents, they are the living memory of humanity ”.
He also reminded spouses that “children, and especially young people, observe you carefully and seek in you the testimony of a strong and trustworthy love.” “How important it is that young people see with their own eyes the love of Christ alive and present in the love of married couples, who witness with their concrete life that love is possible forever!”, He added. (I)
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