Judge Katarzyna Wesołowska-Zbudniewek from the District Court in Łódź has several decades of experience in adjudicating family cases. Recently, she described on Facebook the case of a married couple who met in court to end their shared history without adjudicating guilt. “The parties do not have minor children, so it seems that the case will not last long, because it will be limited only to a short hearing of the parties and determining whether all ties between the parties have expired,” she noted at the beginning of the entry. During his testimony, however, it turned out that the man had experienced domestic violence.
They asked for a divorce. “He didn’t take care of himself and she was ashamed to be seen with him.”
From Judge Wesołowska-Zbudniewek’s entry, we learn that the woman who appeared in the courtroom was tall and elegantly dressed. She had delicate makeup, appropriate to the circumstances, and a smile on her face. The man, in turn, is described as thin, with strongly defined cheekbones and sallow complexion.
“I start questioning the plaintiff. She says that for many years she has not had anything in common with her husband, that he did not take care of himself to such an extent that she was ashamed to be seen with him in public, so they have no mutual friends and do not share common passions. In addition, children who are now adults, have also turned away from their father. At the end, she says that she sees no possibility of reconciling with her husband,” we read.
When the woman finished, it was time for the man to testify. He slowly got up and, word by word, blurted out what had happened during their 30 years of marriage. The judge described his testimony in detail. They are proof of great courage.
Domestic violence has no gender
“Please judge, it was not a successful marriage from the very beginning. My wife comes from a rich family, I grew up in a poor house. I thought I had met the love of my life. The wedding was organized by her parents. Then the children appeared. After 7 years of marriage, I had an accident and I couldn’t work anymore due to a spinal injury. Then the first insults started. You’re a loser, you’re a filth, you’re no good for anything, you’re not even a man in bed,” we read.
As the man added, his partner treated him this way even in the presence of his friends. Because of this, he stopped going out with her and hoped it would improve the situation. “Unfortunately, it got worse day by day. Until she finally hit me in the face for the first time. Then she hit me regularly. I couldn’t hit her back. I called the police once, they laughed at me and said that I must not be able to keep a woman in check. More I didn’t call anymore. I locked myself in the room because I didn’t want to provoke her,” he said.
The woman who supported the family was supposed to give him money and account for every penny. “I felt humiliated every day until I finally stopped asking. Then the giving out of food started, because slackers don’t eat if they don’t earn money. I stayed in this marriage for the sake of the children, because I thought they needed me, but over time I realized I realized that no, because they started treating me like SHE did. Your honor, I felt relieved when I received the lawsuit. I don’t want to have anything to do with this woman,” he concluded.
Initially, there was silence in the courtroom, then the judge asked the woman if she would like to respond to her husband’s words. She only replied that she acted this way because “she wanted the man’s good” and “for him to get down to some work.” The marriage was dissolved. Judge Katarzyna Wesołowska-Zbudniewek, describing this case, wanted to draw attention to the fact that domestic violence has no gender. And men who experience it often remain silent for fear of stigmatization.
“And I wonder how many such stories there are? How many men are able to talk about it? How strong is the implication that it is only a man who abuses a woman? How difficult is it for men to break taboos? These questions remain unanswered. However, I hope that there will be more men who will want to talk about it. We need to talk about it loudly so that we are not left alone with this problem,” she said
Source: Gazeta
Bruce is a talented author and journalist with a passion for entertainment . He currently works as a writer at the 247 News Agency, where he has established himself as a respected voice in the industry.
