Procrastination is the sister of perfectionism, with which he has an excellent, even dream relationship! They often spend time together and go everywhere together. This duo can be a bit of a mess sometimes and can cause a lot of trouble. How does procrastination relate to perfectionism? To put it simply: achieving perfection is a completely unrealistic goal. Therefore, we postpone starting the tasks as long as possible, even though we know that what awaits us will be very difficult, even impossible. Procrastination (also called procrastination) is an action that aims to postpone something that needs to be done anyway until later in order to avoid unpleasant experiences. Again, we are dealing with an action that may provide relief in the short-term, but may cause problems in the long-term, only here the negative consequences are more visible to the naked eye.
It is no wonder, however, that we do not always have the will and strength to “do” everyday, tedious duties and we would like to postpone it… forever. Postponing cleaning for the next day will most likely not have terribly negative consequences, and this is where the difference between consciously postponing the task tasks, caused by, for example, the desire to rest, and procrastination. Therefore, it is worth considering procrastination when, despite the negative consequences, we still decide to do it. […]
‘Escaping from life to the fullest. How to stop procrastinating and start living’ by Natalia Ziopai Znak Publishing House
Unrealistic goals
If a goal is excessive, unrealistic, unmeasurable, vague, untimely and unattractive, it is difficult to commit to any action towards achieving it. When our inner critic enters the scene after we feel a “sudden burst of motivation”, he usually says: “Now I will show them, now I will do it in such a way that their jaws will drop, I will give it my all!!!”. Then we plan something that will create the WOW effect; something that will be distinctive, we turn up our fantasies even more, especially in the evening, when our mind no longer works logically and does not face reality.
So you get up in the morning, you realize what you have decided, and then you say: “Oh… maybe tomorrow.” So instead of moving towards what is important to us, step by step, we postpone it because “I have to show it now.” Therefore, I encourage you to pursue your goal in small steps and be guided by values, not empty but spectacular goals that are often not even consistent with what you like. It cannot be denied that these types of goals can often be related to the brother of procrastination, i.e. perfectionism.
The meta-analysis indicates that various aspects of perfectionism have a multi-faceted impact on procrastination. When a perfectionist is characterized by the inability to enjoy success after a well-done task, excessive concern about the opinions of others and low self-esteem, this type of perfectionism is most often positively correlated with procrastination (the greater such perfectionistic concerns, the stronger the procrastination).
On the other hand, when a perfectionist has too high standards of performance and demands perfection from himself, it is negatively correlated with procrastination (the higher the standards and the more intense the pursuit of the ideal, the lower the procrastination), which does not mean that it is always good, because there is a tendency to “busy yourself” and sooner or later the resources will run out, and procrastination is just waiting for it!
Belief in sudden enlightenment and motivation
“To do something, you must feel inspired and motivated, work on it, arouse this feeling!” – a classic myth created by pseudo- and pop psychology, but also, unfortunately, I have the impression, by the fitness industry. “Do you want to lose weight? Motivate yourself ! Fix your crown and fasten,” “Tomorrow is a new day, you can do anything if you want. Everything is in your hands!”, “Look at me, I have achieved success, I am full of motivation!”, a moment later: “Don’t compare yourself”, “Join the latest edition of the Motivation exercises for only PLN 579.99!”.
And this is precisely the motivation that has become fashionable, based on empty messages that do not take into account the interior of the individual. Photos of transformations, luxurious interiors, huge successes that statistically only a few achieve. What does this have to do with procrastination? The fact that, for example, when you buy such a program for only PLN 579.99, you delay to watch it and get involved in it.
To sum up, the problem is not the lack of motivation. The problem is waiting for a burst of inspiration, a better mood, a better moment, after all, those on the other side of the screen are so motivated! And here comes the problem, because we can wait forever for such a “surge”, because motivation is the result of achievements, not their cause. The media world often presents it differently, because it simply sells. We buy it because it is looking for a quick solution, just as quick as avoiding…
I guess only in books based on scientific psychology can you find information that, in order to eliminate procrastination, it will probably be better to deal with negative emotions, learn to tolerate discomfort, psychological/therapeutic work, look inside yourself and look at other difficult things and, in fact, understanding that it is not worth making your life dependent on a sense of motivation, but on the effectiveness of action that directs you towards what is valuable.
Low self-esteem
It cannot be denied that low self-esteem may be related to perfectionism and other psychological difficulties that I mentioned. In fact, it accompanies many disorders, which only indicates that procrastination may be just the tip of the iceberg. Low self-esteem is often associated with a lack of faith in one’s own abilities and a low sense of effectiveness, which makes it harder to believe in the sense of one’s actions and easier to boycott them, listening to the voice of the inner critic. As you can guess, such aspects do not make actions more effective, on the contrary – the effects are weaker, which gives false evidence to confirm one’s worthlessness.
Procrastination associated with low self-esteem may therefore try to protect us from making further “failures”. The mind considers possible rewards and possible risks, and since we as humans are naturally averse to risk and loss, this “emotional part of the brain” chooses a smaller, short-term reward and rejects the risk that comes with failure. The fear of failure is stronger.
Unfortunately, this way it is impossible to build the foundations of healthy self-esteem or find out whether the risk could have paid off. Things that had to be done anyway are done, but the execution is accompanied by stress, tension and negative attitude, which closes the vicious circle of low self-esteem and procrastination.
Fear of success
Whenever I talk about this form of avoidance in relation to this type of fear, I get asked a lot of questions about how it is possible that someone is afraid to succeed. It’s very likely! I think many of us have found ourselves in this situation. Unfortunately, socially, success is often measured by one measure – the measure of wealth, beauty and luxury. Well, I don’t encourage you to approach it this way at all, because for one person success may mean getting out of bed and taking a bath, for another it may mean taking a five-minute walk a day, and for another it may mean starting her dream bakery. The view on the matter is changing, because while a decided minority may be afraid of wealth, beauty and luxury, the situation is slightly different when it comes to success measured by a different measure.
So how can you be afraid of success? Do you remember a situation when you saw a brilliant training/job offer, but your mind was filled with dark thoughts that you wouldn’t be able to cope there? Or this: you wanted to take part in a competition, but you were afraid that winning might involve you in something that requires a lot of effort, and you don’t know if you have enough resources? Achievements can really be feared because they bring changes, the risk of fatigue or failure, they steal comfort and often free time. Additionally, we may have beliefs about ourselves that are given to us by the imposter syndrome (a form of unfounded self-insecurity and the feeling of being cheated), which screams: “You don’t deserve this success, it’s a coincidence that you achieved it,” “They don’t know yet,” that you can’t do anything”, “Your work does not deserve such attention”, “They will definitely discover that you are a fraud.”
Imposter syndrome may be related to a child’s insecure attachment style to caregivers and conditional love. Perfectionism adds its two cents here, excessive ambition and low self-esteem smile. Therefore, we should not be surprised that we postpone the completion of a task when our heads are full of dark thoughts and fears.
Source: Gazeta
Bruce is a talented author and journalist with a passion for entertainment . He currently works as a writer at the 247 News Agency, where he has established himself as a respected voice in the industry.
