“I am a washerwoman, a cleaner and a cook. My husband treats the house like a hotel”

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I have always dreamed of having a happy family that will move in and live in a house full of love. When I got married, I felt it was the best thing that ever happened to me. I wanted good for myself, more than for myself. After three years of getting to know each other, we decided to have our first child. The husband was very involved in parenthood, and at the same time did not neglect his household duties. I had time to go out with my friends for coffee, and at the same time I was still professionally fulfilled in a job that I enjoyed. When the second child appeared, the spell was broken. My life has turned into a nightmare I can’t get out of.

We decided that I would stop working because someone had to run the household

When I returned home after the second birth, my husband was initially very withdrawn and less and less involved in everyday joint activities. Either he was doing something alone or saying he was tired and needed sleep. He often worked overtime and sat at work from morning to evening without informing me that he had taken another extra job. Although he had the opportunity to work from home, he never did.

We decided that I would stop working because someone had to run the household. I became dependent on him. I trusted him that it would be fine, because I would have more time for myself. Unfortunately, it was a fairy tale.

“Sometimes I even think he treats me like a housewife”

We’ve been married for almost twelve years and love each other very much, but more and more I feel neglected. When the children appeared, I have the impression that my husband is running away to work, and I can’t pursue myself professionally, because I have a house to support. I am a washerwoman, cleaner and cook. Husband treats the house like a hotel. How to deal with this?

Sometimes I even think that he treats me like a housewife. Even contact with children is indifferent to him. It is because it is. When he comes home, he eats and goes to sleep. He keeps saying he loves me, but I don’t feel it. Honest conversations don’t help. He explains that I have too much imagination and that I am the most important thing to him. I feel like I’m in a dead end street. I don’t want a divorce because I’m afraid of loneliness. What would you do in my place?

Janet.

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