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Beata Pawlikowska is a well-known Polish traveller, writer, journalist and translator. In addition, he also deals with photography and book illustration. She has many publications to her credit, such as “Blondynka w jungle” or “Training Happiness” and collaborates with many magazines, including “National Geographic”. She can also be heard on many radio stations, and she was even nominated for the Grand Press award for her broadcast “The World According to Blondes”. Pawlikowska in many interviews and conversations told how much she has been through in her life.
Beata Pawlikowska’s teenage rebellion and lack of self-acceptance. “I didn’t like myself”
Beata Pawlikowska was born on June 11, 1965 in Koszalin. Even as a teenager, she followed different paths than her peers. She sometimes came to school in pajamas or a hat made of a toilet seat cover. The journalist as a rebellious, but at the same time lost teenager, ran away from home, she also did not avoid alcohol, cigarettes, she was tempted by drugs. All these activities ended with the decision of the teaching council to expel her from school. The star said that it was a kind of escape from her own person, which was associated with a lack of self-acceptance. In addition, Pawlikowska struggled with problems with . W recalled how she perceived herself and her body as a teenager.
In high school, I thought I was fat and ugly and needed to lose weight. I called myself names, I didn’t like myself. I tried to lose weight, but the ‘strong’ will was not enough for long. In the evening I ate sweets and felt even more disgusted with myself. I hated myself for being so weak-willed, stupid, not as cool as other people.
Leaving for London and eating problems. Fighting bulimia and anorexia
The journalist studied English and Hungarian studies twice, but after some time she decided to stop studying because she decided that it was not for her. As a 19-year-old, she went to London, where she wanted to taste a new life. The change of place of residence did not deprive the young traveler of problems related to the perception of her figure. She continued to set herself further punishments, such as making decisions to stop eating and limit herself to drinking tap water only. This resulted in excessive hair loss and no menstruation. In one of the interviews, Pawlikowska said:
When I was twenty, one day I decided not to eat at all. And I stopped! I only allowed myself to drink tap water. I was consciously hurting myself. I wanted to punish myself for being hopeless. If I thought about what I was doing, I would have to admit that it’s pure self-destruction that can’t lead to anything good.
At some point, when the young traveler was troubled by a lack of energy, which often ended up spending time lying in bed without strength, and additionally noticed pale skin and excessive hair loss, she decided to go to the doctor. As Pawlikowska admitted in one of the interviews, “she always wanted to be flat as a board”, and when she succeeded, she realized that she was addicted to not eating. A visit to a specialist caused concern for the journalist. She then heard that due to the emaciation and exhaustion of the body, some of her internal organs would begin to atrophy, if not . The improvement lasted only a few weeks, and she went from anorexia to bulimia. Finally, one evening, when the disease progressed, Beata Pawlikowska heard the voice of reason.
Gluttony – vomiting – gluttony – vomiting. I felt like a slave to my body. […] After many failed attempts, one day when I wanted to eat another portion of sweets, I listened to the voice of reason that was saying, screaming somewhere inside me: Don’t do it! You don’t want to do that! You’re not hungry! Don’t eat or you’ll feel self-loathing!
A traumatic event causes a suicide attempt. “He locked the door…”
In Beata Pawlikowska, she gathered for a personal confession. She told about a situation that made her try to commit suicide. When she met a boy in London, they talked about each other. The traveler revealed that she writes stories, and he replied that he also does it and would be happy to show her his written works, which were in his apartment.
I thought he would actually show me his stories. He showed me something else… Locked the door, raped me, then fell asleep like a stone.
Years later, Pawlikowska admitted that it was a certain limit for her and she reached a certain limit then. She realized that in her search for acceptance she was able to “fly like a moth into a fire”. The growing star, after this event and in the face of the emotions that accompanied her at that time, tried to take her own life twice. Pawlikowska also talked about her suicide attempt for the first time.
I decided to end myself. I took some sleeping pills, wrote a goodbye note, and lay down on the floor. As luck would have it, my mother came home early from work that day.
The next stage of her maturation was addiction to casual meetings with men. The journalist admitted years later that as a young person she confused the need for love with the need for sex. Soon Beata Pawlikowska She developed a great passion for traveling and discovering the world. It helped her slowly forget all the traumatic experiences from her past and feel your inner strength and value.
If your life is at risk due to suicidal thoughts or attempted suicide, for immediate crisis intervention, call the police on 112 or go to the A&E department of your local psychiatric hospital.
If you need to talk to a psychologist, you can use the number 116 123. On the website you will also find a list of organizations that run telephone services for mental health specialists, help for children and youth or victims of violence.
Source: Gazeta
Bruce is a talented author and journalist with a passion for entertainment . He currently works as a writer at the 247 News Agency, where he has established himself as a respected voice in the industry.
